MRS - Idealistic Expectations

So, for the longest time...
like since we graduated from High School.
I've been trying to convince my two best friends from High School to come down to College Town, and be roommates with me.

It hadn't happened in so long, that it was more of a token expression,
When it actually ended up happening.
My friends decided to move down to go to school in College Town.
And they wanted to be roommates!

Yay!

I was a mixture of excitement and nervousness.
Because this could either turn out awesome.
Or we'd no longer be friends at the end of this...

It's that sort of thing where they were talking about how much time we could spend together, how much we could do together.

And yet....expectations...are not being met.
The ideal...was a nice dream.

Because the two of them have been able to hang out more often than I have with them because they've lived in the same town since we've graduated, while I moved away.

Soo....
Things are kind awkward between us.
in that we haven't yet found something to break past the 'what do we talk about' phase.
Because before...we'd meet up, catch a movie, chat a little...and then go home.
Now.
Now. that we see each other every day.
What is there to actually talk about?
It's the sad truth that our interests have somewhat gone on separate paths...

And so what could have been amazing...
Isn't being so amazing right now.

It's kinda hurtful really.
Because they were so excited to move in with me. To do stuff with me.
And yet we don't.

I come in all the time to find them chatting animatedly with each other,
But when I enter...they  fall silent...end up leaving the room soon after...

If I try to make conversation...it feels forced. Stilted.... like they want it done with as soon as possible.

Then they end up disappearing into a bedroom, to continue chatting and laughing....

Leaving me feeling left out.
I listen to them, having fun, laughing, chatting, talking about everything under the sun...
And I'm saddened,
I'm lonely.
Because I'm not being included. :(
I crave to have what they have with them...
But it's not happening.

Granted, we've only been at this like a week....
But still.... I wish it was an easier transition.
Because being the odd man out,
Is my least favorite pastime.

-Sarnic Dirchi